My aunt, Judy Hunter, is my father’s second oldest sister. She was married, until his death, to a Statistics professor at the University of Wisconsin – Madison. There is no doubt in my mind that I would’ve become a very different person if she hadn’t seen something she liked in me and made me feel special. No matter how young I was, she made me feel like my thoughts were valuable. She always took me aside at large family gatherings to spend time with just me. She opened my eyes to how life could be lived differently than the one I grew up in: organic eating, tai chi, fondue, community gardens, lifelong book clubs. She was a passionate, renowned expert/speaker on Thomas Merton. She spent years documenting our family’s genealogy in incredible detail. I once asked a simple question about it. She went into such so much historical political and religious data and personal family history that I had to get out a notebook to keep track of it all. I get my long-windedness from her. đ She was a successful attorney (at a time when most women were not working professionals) who in later years worked to teach older folks how to protect their money from devious fraudsters. The first time I ever travelled without my parents was to stay with my aunt in Madison when I was around 15 years old. I loved every minute of it. She has been in a care facility for some time now due to her dementia. She has a wonderful set of caregivers who email updates weekly. It is always a joyous moment when the updates include her sounding just like her old self – stubbornly resisting help and getting her button done herself, speaking up for herself, etc. She doesn’t care to eat much anymore, but she still like chocolate which I send to her with pictures of us together. She doesn’t remember me, but she recognizes me as family and has told the caregiver, “I’ve always liked her.”
I’ve always loved her.
I can’t bear the day she is gone.